The Importance of Sleep

By far one of the hardest lessons for me as a new mother was this: I NEED sleep.

Before I gave birth to my first son in 2006, I most definitely took it for granted. I enjoyed being up late into the evenings, and then sleeping in to my heart's content. What a rude awakening it was to discover that I no longer had the luxury of my own schedule, that everything I did now centered around the tiny, helpless infant with a booming, commanding voice. Even as I write this, my son is now sixteen months old and is still the master of my schedule.

If you are an expectant parent or would like to be, let me offer you a gem of advice. Now is the time to really perk up and pay attention. If you take one thing from this article, PLEASE let it be this: DON'T BE A MARTYR!

It's bad enough that you have to feed your baby every two hours (and it takes a heck of a lot longer to finish the process if you have to pump your milk as well). If your baby is sleeping, that is the time for you to sleep as well. It's so tempting to want to catch up on the things that you've neglected, such as the dishes, laundry or even checking email. But really, you need to sleep. Your baby wants you to sleep as well. It's OK for your house to be a mess with a newborn, no one is going to judge you there. And I guarantee there are plenty of people in your life who would love to help you with those tasks... or at least hold your baby while YOU do them.

Also regarding your newborn, co-sleeping, as wonderful of an experience that it is, is hazardous to your sleeping needs. I adored sleeping with my son. I loved the way he smelled, and the way he snuggled in really tight in my armpit. I never felt so needed in all my life. But the truth is this: not only is it dangerous (there are a lot of suffocations each year as a result of co-sleeping), but you're in a constant state of high-alert even in your sleep. Plus, they jerk around a lot because they can't control their limbs! Believe me, there is no true rest to be had with a baby in your bed.

The good news, though, is that if you must have your baby nearby, there are many different types of cribs that hook up to the side of your bed which are much safer. So far, I don't believe it to be too terribly difficult to wean a baby from the bed to his crib. My son was used to his crib in just two nights and now refuses to sleep in our bed. However, I'm sure that just in typing that I just shot myself in the foot, and I will be cursed with the rest of my children being very difficult when it comes to going to their own crib in their own room.

It took me a year before I was able to get a normal sleeping pattern down. There were many nights where I would get 0-2 hours, and often times, my own mother would take my son so that I could get a little shut eye.

After awhile I got used to the lack of sleep and it was impossible for me to stay asleep for more than two hours at a time. Even harder was for me to fall back asleep once I was awake. Learning HOW to sleep took discipline, and it wasn't at all fun (I wanted to catch up on my favorite TV shows while my baby slept!), but it's been WORTH IT.

I forced myself to go to bed every night at the same time, and rise every morning at the same time. I also did little tricks that have been tried and true over the years, such as drinking warm milk, avoiding TV in the hours before bedtime, and counting backwards from 100. After just a week, my body was trained to sleep from 9 pm until 6:30 am. Unheard of for me, really. I don't think I've ever slept those hours in my life.

Sleep is essential to our well-being. Getting our minimum of 7-8 hours gives us an immediate healthy glow in our skin. Our skin is more youthful and healthier with sleep. Sleep also allows our bodies to produce vital hormones such as progesterone, which for women is a major factor in the way we feel. Many times, depression is cured with the increase in progesterone. Not sleeping will force our bodies to produce cortisol, and all sorts of bad comes from that, including weight gain and hypertension. And really... what good are you as parent if your thinking is cloudy and your reflexes are slow?

Therefore, don't be a martyr. Sleep for the benefit of your children, because taking care of you is an important part of caring for your baby.